Since the first barrier is your natural reaction, the first step involves suspending that reaction. To engage in joint problem-solving, you need to regain your mental balance and stay focused on achieving what you want. A useful image for getting perspective on the situation is to imagine yourself standing on a balcony looking down on your negotiation. (Getting Past No, page 11)
"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret." Ambrose Bierce
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